Do You Have an Honest Relationship?
Countless folks have written into [email protected] and have shared about relationships that have gone awry. They feel. Truth is something that not be modified. Telling the truth is always a big decision to make for everyone at any moment. Sometime truth could. I believe that being honest in a relationship, which can be either friends or an engaged couple, is one of the most important things to achieve a.
Lying Vs Telling The Truth In Relationships
Not how you are supposed to feel. Not what society says you should feel, or how you think you should feel. It is what you do feel - in your heart.
For in our hearts, we all know what those truths are. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email. Out of politeness, embarrassment, shyness, avoidance, or just not wanting to hurt their feelings, we can find ourselves not sharing our innermost feelings.
The Power Of Telling The Truth
We may find ourselves inhibiting and censoring our truest, deepest worries and fears with the people we love the most. And, our relationships will suffer for it - from the lack of depth, from lack of real connection, and from the shear superficiality of inauthenticity.
Here is a spiritual rule of thumb: But, what is our truth? Truth is how you actually feel. When I am talking with a client and they tell me how they really feel, I will ask them if they have shared this with their partner, and invariably they will say, "Well, I can't say that, can I? Yes, of course you can.
And you need to. If you want your relationship to deepen and grow, then you have to trust the love that the relationship is built on. You need to bet on love. Even, in the worse case scenario, if you discover that the relationship cannot handle deeper feelings, then that's good information to know.
It tells you something of the depth and durability of the love. So, you really have nothing to lose in finding this out. And, potentially, everything to gain. But how do we speak these fragile vulnerabilities, these hurts and pains, when our fear is that if we do, it will just make things worse?
This brings us to another spiritual principle, which is: Truth is a precious commodity. Your innocent and uncensored truth, the truth of your heart, is valuable to your relationship. By telling the truth to your partner, you are opening up the possibility for more intimacy in your relationship.
So often, this can be difficult. They were probably in the shower that morning going over the dramatic soliloquy they were going to give you, and all the ways they were going to tear you a new one… So if you lie…you are in for it!
It is already pre-ordained! Tell the exact truth, in the most bold, blunt, and honest manner in which they did not expect to hear it! But not only that…do so in such a straight foreward unexpected manner that it baffles and confounds them!
- 'telling truth is a virtual and important in any relationship' - essay
- 5 Reasons why Truth-Telling is Best for Relationships
- The Importance of Telling The Truth In Your Relationships!
What makes this work? What is the science behind it? See this person was expecting you to lie or avoid the topic, or do anything to prevent admitting what you did that they are trying to confront you about.
They have already prepared themselves mentally for that and have all the thought and behavioral patterns congruent with that situation lined up in their head.
That is their mental process right now.
'telling truth is a virtual and important in any relationship' - essay
The very last thing they are expecting you to do is to tell the truth! And what happens when you do so…and not only that…but do so in such an honest, straight foreward manner that their entire pre-prepared response that is already locked and loaded, which is probably beginning to come out right after they asked you the question because they were so ready for you to lie…is no longer congruent with your response?
Well, their pattern has been interrupted…and they do not know what to do or say! Instead they will be completely perplexed….
The Importance of Telling The Truth In Your Relationships! - Daily Love with Mastin Kipp
But you see you must be straight foreward with the truth, and say so in a manner that is completely sure of yourself and confident in giving the information. Now this does not mean you cannot have regrets about it. This is not to say that you have to stand behind your actions. If you are being questioned about seeing other people and do not want to be exclusive with this person, or some other issue that you do feel you are in the right about but think should be a non-issue and would otherwise have told a lie to avoid ityou will have to take another route however!
However lets say that you are even more in the wrong and there is a good reason for this to be made a serious issue and for your partner to take an offensive stance…like for instance seeing another person when you are already in an exclusive relationship with your partner…well when confronted with an issue like that you would have to revert to a combination of my first example and my last example: And your partner will appreciate your honesty.
Because that would be lying! Its really not about you, I do respect you and want to do right by you, but I have to really do what is right by me first and foremost and make sure that I am living the way that I see fit.
And I honestly cant see how it would be fair to you for me to try to live a lie and do things that I do not want to do for you, because that to me is dishonest. So if that is how you feel, when your partner confronts you about doing whatever it was you did, then you need to tell them that, and that the kind of relationship in which you loose your freedom and have to answer to another person is just not for you!
Because having to change your lifestyle for someone is just not genuine! You may not even have to loose them. They may not like hearing that, but they will appreciate it much more than your lying to them. And so in conclusion, here is the truth about lies: Because it will cause a pattern interrupt, and then they will have no choice but to face the honest to god truth that you have to tell them about why you do the things you do, which they will have no choice but to appreciate the fact that you are being so honest and genuine about.
That is not to say that they will like it. They obviously will not.